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1. |
Rain, Rain
02:46
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I can’t write a love song without tears
What happened through the years
I want to be alone until the rain clears
Still I am here and I fear the sheer drear and veer from anything dear
I cannot write those songs in this gear
Turn it off I hate to hear
Something now so insincere
I got the misery right but not this severe
Singing about a girl that would disappear
It rains and I try to steer clear
I don’t make songs that are sad
I’m not sad I’m mad
I threw away the note pad
The acoustic songs I had
And decided I’d be metal clad
I rapped and it wasn’t bad
But they never wanted me in an ad
I just stuck my head in a bag
Slept like I had jet lag
Had no right to brag
Bother with a price tag
It’s gonna rain and I’m gonna drag
Put the tempo at 30 it’s a funeral you fag
From rich bitch to a rag
More like 30 bpm to a body bag
Where do I go when I just snag
They took my white flag
I’m not going to dance in the fucking rain
A rain cloud follows me like on a chain
Like it was given a key to my terrain
Of my house, of once loved, but it doesn’t explain
Why I can’t see my past the windowpane
In rains so often yet I still have a stain
I can’t get on a plane
Or contain
My songs from going down the drain
With the tears yet I can’t complain
This is a sad song I tried to restrain
But it’s been raining so long I cannot refrain
There’s just no love to sing of in vain
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2. |
Bolt
02:32
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Don’t be fooled by a blue sky
Bone dry
Not caught by
The eye
Rain is plain Jane, mundane, for a drain, weather vane, window pane
Get out your black umbrella and complain
I start fires; open flame
The forest ran wild with me to blame
Out of the blue is my name
I am hotter than the sun and put hell to shame
I am a flash you can’t contain
But you like it all the same
You’re quiet but insane
Oh god my life has gone to shit
Every little bit
Is counterfeit
A thunder cloud hung within it
This is what I get
This is why I I’m hit
I was too numb to admit
Your hair stood on end
Do you get the letters I send
Let me be your friend
Stand tall I’ll descend
Fool you one time, we’ll pretend
I won’t fool you again
I scream too loud comprehend
So far away you don’t know where I begin
You seek shelter under a tree I pin
Lie down and tell me when
You may not die but you cannot defend
Plain Jane just tried to blend in
Oh god my life has gone to shit
Every little bit
Is counterfeit
A thunder cloud hung within it
This is what I get
This is why I I’m hit
I was too numb to admit
I am in your home
You’re electrocuted on the phone
Leave a message at the tone
Windows shatter as they are blown
There is loud cracking of stone
You would’ve died of the shock alone
A towering flame has grown
Your house crumbles and you should’ve known
Sylvia Plath strife to the bone
You put in every dress you’ve sewn
Every set of kitchenware you own
You asked if the weather would postpone
I just need a bath and time alone
An affair is your methadone
You’ve become monotone
Kerosene Queen has overthrown
In the the next life you will not drone, moan, clone, be a full-blown headstone, you will atone
Child you are accident prone
Do not roam
Drop your sad Y chromosome
Take this life and honey comb
Something not monochrome
Then build a new home
The fire should be your own
Oh god my life has gone to shit
Every little bit
Is counterfeit
A thunder cloud hung within it
This is what I get
This is why I I’m hit
I was too numb to admit
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3. |
Bridges
02:50
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I tagged that bitch many times before
Like a tattoo and always wanting more
More male body parts than I cared for
Just a street racer and bad kid to the core
Always two ahead and one foot out the door
Saying I’ll cross that bridge when i get off the floor
One day it succumbed in a war
There’s always war don’t know what for
There was a lady that walked by with the uproar
Fair-skinned, I tried to ignore
She said when will they get to restore
Never I said
She tilted her head
I said this life is war and nothing more and we’re all dead
He killed a man and didn’t know his name
For that he has valor and no shame
Leaders are not to blame
They don’t set every enemy town aflame
Oh follow because others do the same
Oh march on because you are easy to tame
Fuck a war, nothings gonna change
Someone will always wear a chain
That’s not even why you came
Selfishness will always reign
Doesn’t matter who gets a bullet to the brain
Successors die off but bloodshed will remain
These people have only known pain
The enemy is what you became
War crime against a person, no need to explain
Fuck the other side is part of the campaign
We’re their other side, not clear to the inhumane
There must be a nuke for every civilian terrain
Yeah I burned that fucker down
The bridge fell and I hope they drown
I’m never going back to that town
Everyone there is a fucking clown
Does what their told without a sound
I stole the crown
Broke it and threw it to the ground
In war people are often not found
Do people really look around
Because it seems there’s no value to surround
We mindlessly live in a battleground
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4. |
I am the DSM-5
02:13
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A lot of people with friends wish they were mine
Antisocial personality disorder is a hard friend to find
Unless you know someone who’s committed a crime
I’m not a serial killer though, nevermind
Scrappy rapper happy scrapper rhymed
My shit show music is undefined
Industrial metal rap is the first of its kind
Fun and concerning both combined
Be my friend I make myself laugh all the time
I am pleasantly uncomfortable at baseline
I am often lauded as out of my god damn mind
I once did scare that one man blind
Show me how to blend in with humankind
I am DNR if that ever comes up sometime
I’m on a box checking spree
HI? More like HIT
SI? More like YES I agree
Your mind? M-I-s-s-I-n-g
Sure sign? Nothing you can see
But I can hear, lol hashtag party emoji
I am a new drug the others bored me
The whole shebang, they call me holy
Lord child they say, call me lordly
They act like I am an evil spirit that needs freed
I am a new god the others wanted me to read
Delusions of grandeur, that’s not really my speed
I am reinventing life where I am almighty guaranteed
I am reinventing music; a ceiling no longer a need
So psych ward, take heed
I’m going to plug into this amp lined with tweed
And all the lords children will say fuck yeah indeed
Be my friend I have so many thoughts
I crawled right the fuck out of the box
If you hear gunshots
Don’t duck or flee the sidewalks
I have two glocks
They’re after me ulike before-shots
Ready aim shoot down on the spot
Leave me behind if I get caught
One of them is my friend who I don’t see a lot
Other than that I like to be a lone flowerpot
I try to sleep when people send emails and whatnot
But I can make tea that’s hot
We can sip and talk about why the fuck not
Oh will you be my emergency contact I almost forgot
This book is just a list of my quirks
Arbitrary criteria for the frameworks
I’m just an arrogant smart ass who smirks
I do whatever works
Call me a bipolar bitch who twerks
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5. |
Flash
02:52
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Clouded, clouded
Sky crowded, who allowed it
Badlands had a drought hit
Now each cloud hid
I denounced it
Tired of the frown
Coming round with it
I found a tape and rewound it
What about it
There was something but they drowned it
Where will I run when there’s no way around it
If there were shelter I would’ve found it
I’ve never been well grounded
The storm clouds surrounded
Now did
Anyone mark me as counted
I ran away; rain pounded
Badlands was my retreat
Rain, rain said the drumbeat
I sit on the concrete
Is this defeat
Crossing; 20 feet deep
Where do I go to weep
I seep
I was just a black sheep
I no longer made a peep
I ascended with a sweep
Taken up like in sleep
I landed on my feet
On an empty street
Soaked in heat
A car flipped like a fleet
Thrown from the front seat
Where is my home I need to take a seat
To understand the obsolete
I deplete
I deceit
I don’t greet
Change or anything sweet
Badlands was my retreat
Rain, rain said the drumbeat
I sit on the concrete
Is this defeat
Rain, rain take me away
To another day
This is sad I don’t want to say
I run the badlands; make way
I am astray
The rainwater builds and I’m made of clay
Mold me into something different than grey
Don’t know what’s wrong anyway
Badlands was my retreat
Rain, rain said the drumbeat
I sit on the concrete
Is this defeat
Yeah life changes in a flash
I can’t look both ways since the whiplash
The flood chased me out of a heat rash
I learned to swim with a thrash
I learned to love myself from a gash
I learned to make fire from ash
I made a wish on an eyelash
Did I even want to rehash
Badlands was my retreat
Rain, rain said the drumbeat
I sit on the concrete
Is this defeat
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6. |
Mixtape
04:43
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I made you a mixtape that’s not bad
None of that shit is sad
I’m not sad a lot of times I’m mad
I wrote a song for every wound I had
I ran out and wrote like a nomad
I drifted away like a lily pad
I was glad
They all want me to go back to the same
I wasn’t much of a flame
I was too easy to tame
I saw ocean wide and became
Flip flop walked there in the rain
I laugh now that I have a name
They complain
This rap and metal shit is strange
You’re wasting you vocal range
I’m making a anecdotal range
The theme is change
My former self I estrange
She pocketed shortchange
So fuck every little exchange
I was born to interchange
Someone said I sucked, I should get fucked
I wonder how to reconstruct
From feedback left by a dump truck
I’m out of luck
No one thinks outside the box so the radio gets turned up
By a chump
Icky but not Thump
I’m not gonna bump
All of it I lump
Midair off this speed bump
I’m just stumped
Rogers and Hammerstein found a roof and jumped
I just sat down and fucking slumped
Maybe you won’t like what I brought
There are songs that have thought
Pick a genre, it’s got the lot
They say rap is garbage but it’s really not
If you listen to Kendrick and not Travis Scott
I hated country until I found the sweet spot
Of songs not of tractors but shooting people on the spot
I like some pop but what songs? I forgot
Millions of people sing so that don’t mean a lot
I can’t with rock these days, I think it got bought
I just lie and say, hey man, nice shot
But those fuckers from the 90’s brought
Too bad all of them ODed and whatnot
Who is Billie eilish and why is she within earshot
Meanwhile I made a poem come to life on the dot
A Grammy to whomever is a little tea pot
Because I want to pour them out and don’t want a spot
I guess this is really all we got
So your mixtape is like a rainbow
There’s a lot of things I want to show
You but you must know
I live past the black hills where no one will go
Where nothing seems to grow
But I found something to sow
Got out my little hoe
Changed up the tempo
Not it’s not stuck on funeral ass slow
I ain’t good at allegro
130 and a drummer says no
Didn’t change how deep the words went though
Spun it like b-I-n-g-o
Yeah fucker I got 5 ducks in a row
That’s a joke I’m just Jane doe
But ima always sing along to get low
Even so
I write songs and although
No one hears them and I have nothing to owe
This is how I see myself glow
And every song on your mixtape I wrote you know
You make words spill out like an outflow
I wrote under a sky that was indigo
I was red long ago
No love could overthrow
I had been caught in the undertow
But broke off the radio
And sat in my studio
Let it all go
Came to know
Myself and said fuck an afterglow
I’m no longer going to tiptoe
I’m saving you for someday’s tomorrow
Here’s your mixtape
It’s late
You can skip eight
It was a mistake
It escaped
Now a fixed state
Qui sait
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7. |
Confabulate
03:24
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The amnesiac lies awake
A mistake
Does she know her memories are fake
Empty, confabulate
Do not take
Says the bottle for the ache
Break
Open what’s at stake
Who cares for your sake
Another bottle doesn’t make
Your sight less opaque
They reiterate
You don’t know your fate
The damage is in a fixed state
It is too late
Drinking yourself into a stalemate
Irate, to date, sedate, this rate, serrate, narrate, misstate, equate, innate, hate
You’ll die alone, get that straight
You acclimate
She went through the windshield
It’s gonna rain but she won’t yield
Just as our lives had healed
She kills herself on the battlefield
I am disinclined
To remind
Her of the time
She scared me blind
Though her voicemails are kind
I never looked behind
She doesn’t deserve to lose her mind
There’s nothing there to keep aligned
Where will I find
There was nothing I signed
Nothing outlined
I resigned
Undefined
I climbed
Past a war crime
I am a paradigm
But the amnesiac is fine
Goes merrily along with no spine
She drank herself blind
She crosses every line
And this is not mine
Life is hers to decline
It is not my design
There was never any shine
She went through the windshield
It’s gonna rain but she won’t yield
Just as our lives had healed
She kills herself on the battlefield
You’ll die never having known
Your life was as brittle as a bone
You killed everything that had grown
You’ll die alone
I won’t visit your headstone
You’ll die for what you did on your own
You carved into yo in urself like in stone
But your mind is like a dead phone
Call and no one home
She leaves nonsense at my tone
Amnesiac smiles for reasons unknown
Ruled a suicide full-blown
She went through the windshield
It’s gonna rain but she won’t yield
Just as our lives had healed
She kills herself on the battlefield
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8. |
Kite
02:35
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Leyden jar
Jar laden
String laid in
Fade in
The maiden
Played in
The affright stayed in
Trade in
Storm for spark you can wade in
Awaken
Brazen
A key to your house taken
Skeleton key faded
Mistaken
For a layman
Satan
Hasten
A kite invaded
Skies shaded
Raven
Strung up safe haven
Get off at the station
With the spark causation
Flying with your creation
Lay foundation
The key translation
Opens an accusation
Conjuration
Storm cloud defamation
Endangered education
Jar Leyden
No jar mason
I’m coming before thunder
In every storm in summer
I wonder
If I’m an outrunner
I found the spark with a kite
I saw the light
Blindingly bright
Prickling affright
For a sight
In a indigo night
In flight
A weather satellite
Key-holed and held tight
I want to find the white
Insane and quite
I don’t speak but I write
Shock me back alive
I have so far had to drive
Into the ground, I strive
I hide
A key tied
And lost up outside
Rain cried
The spark and I collide
I am anew i lied
No one laid beside
The key I untied
It didn’t open anything I tried
Who am I, I replied
Thunder at the seaside
Not along for the ride
I am ocean wide
I need to wash over like the tide
But the rain dried
And I proved that I can’t decide
In me there is a divide
I am untrue and tried
I am a kite pacified
My life was disqualified
I’m coming before thunder
In every storm in summer
I wonder
If I’m an outrunner
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9. |
Rainbow
02:31
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Sat down another paint pale
I am tired of the fucking grey scale
Of screaming in Braille
Of library quiet and stale
I went outside; I was too pale
My life is no fairy tail
I got up one day to fail
I received black in the mail
My life sits by a sign that reads for sale
I’m doing it over tooth and nail
I’m more than just the minor scale
I’m Persian minor and rebel
Such a mess that you can’t tell
If it’s music or if I just don’t play well
Chromatic but I will never be pastel
I spun the color wheel and landed on red
God damn that color; always going to my head
Blood, bloody knuckle sky, a man dead
Comin in with that lead
Always finding a new way to be bled
Anyway ignore what I just said
The hooded girl who became instead
Nothing like what you read
Cue ball white
8 ball smite
No rainbow in sight
Dark after the light
Odd one out left outright
Blue 2 is bright
Commonplace birthright
I’m the saboteur alright
Black-hearted with all my might
Scatter, chaos reigns to excite
The thunder is why I made the kite
My rainbow bled like a fight
The picture book wasn’t right
Cue ball stared at nothing, lucite
Suddenly it faded; always finite
The dry sky so black I thought it was night
The sun spared no moonlight
I had been chasing a weather satellite
Blue is for a rainy day streak
When the sun doesn’t shine for over a week
Not all sunshine and rainbows; she won’t speak
There’s a tear that rolls down her cheek
The blue was bleak
We’re just people underneath
We bleed from the bleach
We figure from speech
But you cannot reach
So go inside; find peace
My life is no fairytale
Those have no pain scale
The rainbow ended in hail
I’m still gay without fail
There was no unicorn; maybe a ponytail
The sun went ahead and decided to bail
My life is still going to veer off trail
Tracking along like a snail
My family still gonna go through my mail
A bitch may end up in retail
But nonetheless I prevail
And take down the fucking sign that says for sale
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10. |
To Have Torn
03:22
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If I were a hurricane I’d be the evil eye
A passerby
Torn down from the sky
The known flits in reply
Time may fly
But keep the ground on standby
Don’t bother to try
Your home tears by
The tolerance wasn’t high
The middle is not awry
To the core I pry
Screaming where am I
I sigh
The commotion never seems to shy
Because my life is a battle cry
Run down the street
Bare feet
Glass beneath
I destroy everyone I meet
I am the skip and I am the fleet
I do not play neat
No wrangler has me beat
Cut from a sheet
Not the same cloth as a ghost or belief
Not from a sheath
Blow over a new leaf
Lie in a pile, lost in grief
Of the girl I used to defeat
I am bittersweet
Start again but I meet
Watchers meek
They peek
Seek to leak
Photographs of havoc I wreak
I am on a streak
Fuck up every day of the week
Do not speak
I shriek
I am the center of this
My wind blows like a kiss
It’s a blitz
That splits
A nest off
Where it sits
I am in a storm that hits
I start off by calling it quits
By throwing violent fits
I am a martyr who sits
I am shard that never fits
I am what not ms
I reminisce
In my center there once was bliss
That now none of us gets
I am demolition in your midst
I throw down my fist
I break my wrist
It’s you I’ve I missed
Number 1 on my shitlist
I come out swinging with a twist
I am everything they resist
I hate that I exist
I cannot desist
Tear it all down I hissed
The earth and I can’t coexist
I have ruined everything especially myself
The wreckage is all I’ve felt
I was the thundercloud that fell
I swept away our home as well
Opposites attract; storm and quell
Just as well as shotgun to shell
You are no longer centered can you tell
You are in line with a belt
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11. |
I Came Off All My Pills
04:00
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I cancelled all of my appointments
They called and said please don’t disappoint us
You need an anointment
And you’ll put us out of employment
I run away with enjoyment
I am the opposite of buoyant
I am avoidant
I am an annoyance
With flamboyance
I prance
Right out of that circumstance
And dance
While still in public with many a glance
No no they maintain their stance
Come back give us a second chance
I’m breaking up for a bad romance
Woah oh oh oh I stole some plants
Who needs therapy when you have to fuck up in advance
I went merrily along without any pills
I felt like I was in Beverly Hills
The dress attire was frills
Why have I always paid all these bills
Why did I have a job when I am so unskilled
I went to my old job looking like a million bucks
Hear ye hear ye faces of fuck
Today you’re all in luck
I threw all your shit in the garbage truck
And your moms told me you all suck
I’m famous now; you should be starstruck
Please invite me to the next potluck
I dropped in on a meeting
Hello all i wish I was bringing an ass beating
I’d just like to say I’m well and that bears repeating
I called every blocked number in my phone
Many of them did not wish to atone
I said I have been alone
Are you plans for tonight currently unknown
I scheduled too many dates and should have shown
No one called probably cause they were blocked til the tone
I listened to every message pick a bone
I called back and said that i had to postpone
My whole family died and I ran out of methadone
Fuck you for whatever you did cabron
I went to my old job looking like a million bucks
hear ye hear ye faces of fuck
I dropped on on a meeting
Hello all i wish I was bringing an ass beating
I’d just like to say I’m well and that bears repeating
I have a lot to say to the children out there
So with such wisdom I’d decided I’d share
Don’t do drugs kids or just don’t write it on a questionnaire
Love thine others play fair yet square
Smoking kills that’s why I have healthcare
Don’t smoke in bed that’s why I’m missing hair
Don’t tell lies because you’re stupid and we’re aware
Respect your elders because my life needs prayer
Watch your mouth cause there’s a grown up rule I won’t share
Put your shit away because I sure won’t, so there
Go head and lean back and fall out your fuckin chair
Don’t have sex kids you’ll have to worry about child care
That shits expensive give that child enough for cab fare
I went to church with a big ole hat
Lord Jesus help you child and all that
Sunday school was confused when I sat
You are 27 so scat
I went to town hall like a diplomat
Hear ye hear ye bitches lookin fat
Many a fuckface bureaucrat
Enough chitchat
It’s time to to appoint me autocrat
You will now engage in mortal combat
Please turn down the thermostat
Ring ring Jess please come back
I’m about to snap like Kodak
Listen that doctor’s a quack
He mistakes megalomaniac
For making a wisecrack
I popped a fruit snack
Climbed through the back of my hatchback
Locked out again like a hijack
None of you understand my zodiac
My soundtrack
You just stick me in a blister pack
Jess you are ill, we can’t have you crack
You about to be blocked clack
I came off of my meds and now I’m god
In dollar tree reigning abroad
Out of dollar tree now outlawed
Everyone began to applaud
Yes, to all of you a brief nod
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12. |
Satellite
02:27
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Circulation
Interpolation
Slave for this great nation
I am at a known location
Above earth in its rotation
Satellite vocation
Back to the station
Circulation
Divination
But the Voodou sorceress is Haitian
Haiti black magic indignation
Evil Eye affects the causation
But the phone tells you about precipitation
Ha how bout that weather fixation
Tv tv tv narration
Weather man gets a standing ovation
Green screen dreamed keenly seeming to beam a stream of sunbeams screaming it’s teeming go out gleaming and sun screening blue sky leaning grass greening
Weather man is intervening
I am the earpiece with no meaning
I am far above earth
What is it worth
I diverge
A life without urge
A life I purge
Vividly
Storms below mimicry
What I know no differently
Simplicity
Voodou sorceress has affinity
For wicked trickery
She vindictively
Guesses unskillfully
No validity
I see what she cannot see
In orbit unfree
I foresee
Without eyes or a person to be
I know what will happen to me
I will not go free
I am used with a key
Fuck the leaves in the tea
So I’ll be on nbc
That’s a guarantee
And the sun will shine as we referee
We bring you vitamin D
Like the phone shows you caller Id
Sorcery on your tv
What we don’t know is our reality
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13. |
Overcast
02:59
|
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My time has almost passed
I am no wife, I am last
To the party, the outcast
I lost my way, but they never asked
I stood outside with the overcast
The forecast such a contrast
In this life I was miscast
In this life it went by too fast
Asleep standing up
It’s my understanding of
Handling
Long-standing
Stranding
That it seems I’ve had enough
I sit at home alone
Here no one throws a stone
I wear my fingers to the bone
Writing songs that postpone
The feeling of being grown
And not having a life of my own
I don’t answer the phone
I’m now someone I’ve never known
Why my god damn psychiatrist gotta retire
Now I have to put up a flier
Solid ground for hire
I aspire
To walk a tight wire
Be someone I admire
Be the talk of the town crier
Inspire
I’m surrounded by barbed wire
How to keep in a wildfire
Is that what I desire
I plug into an amplifier
Sing like the song must transpire
Like there’s no date to expire
I never tire
Preaching to a tone deaf choir
I’m home free call me a liar
Asleep standing up
It’s my understanding of
Handling
Long-standing
Stranding
That it seems I’ve had enough
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Pyrophoria Atlanta, Georgia
The one woman band from Atlanta, Georgia.
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